Walking the Walk

This post tonight is raw, as I am raw emotion.
The day started with dropping my car of to the garage, a very scary venture as some of you may remember I am still unemployed, I begin my new found job in mid March, a job that is significantly less money but significantly more pleasure and what is available. My well intentioned older brother picked me up from the garage and gave me a lecture about how I may need to move from the place I love so much, to cut back on my finances as I heat with oil and it has almost buried me this winter. I have beautiful gardens here that I put in and I love this home. I reminded myself that his suggestions were just that and I am in charge of me.
Fast forward and the garage has called back and I am looking at least $800.00 worth of work and it is rising and the car will be there until at least tomorrow afternoon. Chinese food and the french fries I gave up for a New Year's resolution sure sound good right now.
Luckily I have no car, as I may be tempted, but than the no car keeps me from the gym, and I could use a long workout,
All these feelings happened and I decided to take a long hot bath, with the new Bath Bombs I got in celebration of my 60 pounds of weight lost and the bath helped a lot, until my phone rang and hour ago.
My best friend who suffered a heart attack two weeks ago, called to ask me to bring her to the hospital as her blood pressure was high, and she felt tightness and I have no car. I gave her the advice that she needed to take and that is call 911, and she did and I sit here right now, I was updated by her daughter, she is in the ER and they are running tests and they have already contacted her cardiologist, she will keep me updated. Again I want to eat, and I keep telling myself what I truly have learned and fully believe " Nothing I eat can make this feel better."
I have eaten all my points for the day and as tempted as I am in to feed my emotions I will not, and I will instead, think positive thoughts for my friend, read blogs, my past posts, your posts, anything to cement the new behaviors and remind myself that I started this joureny for my health, to fend off the very same heart issues that are scaring me for my best friend, and just be raw with emotion.
One thing I know for sure, the bills may pile up, I will pay them, the car is just a car, unemployed is unfortunate but it did and does not define me, and at the end of the day it is about you, your family and friends." I'm just sayin."