New Year Approaching

Like the television news shows, I find myself recapping events over the last year. I have the benefit of my blog to go back and reread my journey thus far. It is a great thing to do as I prepare for the upcoming year and set some mini goals and continue on my end goal, lose and maintain 120 pound weight loss.
I have some favorite moments over the last year, and some real awakenings. March of last year I was dealing with life and death moments of my mom, that I am happy to report she survived. She is healthy as can be at 80 and sporting a new hip and like my weight loss rebirth, she seems to have a rebirth of her own, she is living life more fully and that is how I feel too!
While she was struggling and clinging to life, I was feeling all the stress and pain, feeling it not eating it away as in years past, and that was the first indication to me that I was going to succeed this time. Here is what I wrote Look What I found
What I really see now that I did not for all the years I was carrying the extra weight was, I was struggling and clinging to life, it sounds a bit dramatic I admit , but very true. Food was a drug for me, and it was killing me, slowly but nonetheless still killing me. Sleep Apnea, High Blood pressure, Gerd that was eroding my stomache, and emotionally I was numb to how I felt and what I wanted in life. Auto pilot, is what I was on and now with Auto Pilot off I can really feel and see what I want going forward. I have had a year of self discovery that continues every day. I learned I do like exercising, I do not LOVE it, but I like it, I do love how it makes me feel. I also have found that I can handle my emotions without the assistance of a Twinkie or six! I can reach out to friends on or offline to help my feelings and by doing that I am open to being a better friend to them as well.
Recapping is how I will spend the week, counting down to Jan 1, 2011, I will be 47 years old in three weeks, and I am feeling healthier and more alive than I was at 40, Who Knew??!! Have a Great Day!