The Birthday Girl!

So this blog post is about life.
4 years ago, while experiencing for the first time in my life living alone, no parents, no husband, long since divorced and both daughters were on their own, one about to graduate college and the other just finishing her first year. I was feeling pretty darn good , yet pretty scared. Where do I fit in their lives and where do I go from here?
For years all that loved me, family, friends, kids, had heard my mantra, when my kids are grown I will be still young and than it is " My Turn"
Here I was facing " My Turn" and I had no clue where to go or what to do, as that is what happens when you lose yourself in the caring for others. I am so not complaining so please do think that is the case, as life is about choices and when you make them, I am a believer in living with them and making the best of them.
I was just about at a point when I was feeling like I was ready to just focus on me, when what I perceived as " All Hell broke loose." My daughter came home from her first year of college, Pregnant. I was devastated, I felt hurt and disappointed, I would have killed to go to college and being number 6 of 7 children of a family of meager means that was just not an option. She chose life and I totally respect that.
Instead of college I married the first man that I thought was the love of my life and I was half right, he brought me the love of my life, two daughters whom I adore, he was definitely not the love of my life. It was rough and obstacles were there to over come and in the interest if the rest of the story I will not digress. I overcame them and raised two phenomenal daughters and today I celebrate the third Birthday of my Granddaughter. I had no cake, I had no ice cream, I had two slices of pizza for 16 points that I counted. I felt great as I am in the process of fulfilling a life long goal of my own, and that is gaining control of my weight issue and being as healthy as I can be. I did not want cake, I am a cake snob now, if I have cake it will not be a cake mix, it will not be a birthday cake from the nearest bakery, it will be a Rum cake, or Carrot Cake, Tiramasu comes to mind, but not just cake. Every bite will be enjoyed.
When I found out that my daughter was expecting and would not be returning to college and my hopes and dreams for her would be different than her hopes and dreams, I reacted poorly. I cried for weeks on end, I ate, I drank, I pitied myself, and quite frankly was awful. I think back on that and cringe for my daughter as well as for myself. I had and have had my turn to live my life, I made and make choices every day. My choices today are a reflection of lessons I have learned along the way. I never had the opportunities that my children have had but I did have choices. Life happens and how we deal with it is OUR choice. We can eat, drink, cry through it, or we can accept it and trust that everything happens for a reason and that all we can really control is ourselves and how we live. Today I choose to take care of me, my health and by that I mean eating, exercising and building the strongest body I can to be prepared for whatever comes my way. I spent 3 months, eating, drinking, crying and resisting a baby that was coming my way, 4 years later I am rejoicing in the fact that I am a healthy trimmer Grandma, enjoying one of the best things that ever could have come in my life.
Happy Birthday Evie!! Mimi can not imagine a life without you in it, Thank you for that!!